While We Were Still Enemies....

Much has happened in the past month since I last wrote. I have moved from Kuwait Naval Base to Camp Arifjan & I have moved from one location to another while at Arifjan. We now commute to work via contracted bussing because our driving privileges have been revoked by Admiral Redpath. And I no longer work at Shuaiba because I have been re-assigned to the "Transition Training Team" or, in Navy lingo, T3 for short.

All of this was set in motion weeks ago, because big Navy wants to proclaim "Mission Complete!" in this aspect of our support of the Army. The goal is to completely withdraw from all port activities altogether, &, if everything goes according to plan, we should be able to achieve this goal by July during the Hotel rotation.

So, what will I be doing now that I'm assigned to T3? I don't know. I hope to go home earlier than originally anticipated. If I am so blessed then I'll leave here around mid-April. If not then I'm here until mid-May which is my planned rotation date anyway.

With everything in transition & up-in-the-air as it is right now I want so much to be able to know what the immediate future holds. The fact that I know so little & that I can't count on anything for sure until it actually happens is discomfitting. It's like trying to walk on quicksand. But the Command continues to demand flexibility from us claiming our unofficial motto is "Semper Gumby". As for myself, I hope to never see a Gumby show or hear his name again. Ever.

A few weeks ago I had planned on updating this blog but now I'm glad I didn't. For a couple of reasons: First, I was at my lowest point of the deployment &, second, I know so much more now than I did then.

By the grace of God I am no longer being assailed by depressing thoughts which is actually a lack of faith in Him, or, more aptly, functional atheism. Ironically, I was studying the travails of Paul & I knew in my heart that without a doubt he suffered so much more than I have. Yet he strove to be content & joyful in all things.

Also, regardless of whatever my situation, it is still far better than I deserve, for I know the depth of my sins. If I don't see sin as God does then to some extent I will always believe that I somehow deserve God's grace & mercy, & that, even more egregiously, I deserve a saviour & that God somehow owed it to me to have His Son die for the sins I commit! I believe Paul fully understood the depth of his sin & God's view of it; therefore, this understanding added to his contentment & joy.

God is faithful even when I'm faithless. And I am faithless - in more than one area of my life. I can never pride myself on my faithfulness, for in whatever one area I am faithful there are at least ten areas where I am not. Furthermore, the real miracle is not that I'm faithful in just one area - whch is to say, the one area in which God enables me to be faithful - but that God continues to be faithful in all areas in spite of my faithlessness.

As I write this I find myself becoming emotional, & I'm not sure why. By God's faithfulness I'm reminded of the Scripture that reads "... While we were still enemies of God...." & I can't help but praise Him under my breath. Even as I watched "Facing the Giants" - which also schooled me on the faithfulness of God - I was on the verge of tears. I kid you not. But I held them back, for I was not alone.

I wish I could continue but I cannot. There are duties I have yet to perform before the sun sets & the day is quickly fading.

Be it the will of God, I'll see you all soon.